Thomas


Thank you for bringing another precious life into the world and for providing that child a great opportunity for a life filled with love, laughter and opportunity that can happen through adoption.  This is one of the most difficult and unselfish acts a human being could commit and you have my full respect and admiration for doing this, regardless of who you choose to adopt your baby.  Please know that I will provide that life for your baby.  Since I was a teenager, I have always had a very deep desire to have children and I believe this an ideal time for me to start a family.  I have the knowledge, wisdom, financial stability and definitely the heart, as demonstrated by my past and current work with children and youth.

About Thomas

I was born in Royal Oak, Michigan, a suburb of Detroit. I am the oldest of three children and we grew up in a very stable, loving Christian home. My dad was an Engineer and my mom a “stay-at-home-mom”. I have many wonderful childhood memories including trips and family vacations as well as fun activities we did in our own backyard. Some of my favorite activities included swimming in our backyard pool and bike riding. I feel very fortunate to have grown up with very good parents who have always been very supportive and nurturing.

About Tom:

My strong desire to become a parent started when I was a YMCA Camp Counselor at the same summer camp for four (4) summers followed by two (2) additional summers as a Unit Director (next level up). Those summers represent a very significant high point in my life. It introduced me to the pleasure and fulfillment of helping and nurturing a child. I had cabin groups of about ten (10) kids (mostly boys) of ages 8-13. They were vulnerable, having been separated from their families, some for the first time. I really enjoyed getting to know them, facilitating games/activities that enabled them to have fun and laugh. I also nurtured and comforted them when they became homesick or otherwise sad. This is when I first became inspired to become a parent and developed a deep desire to have kids, bond with them, and raise them to adulthood.

My Work:

I graduated in May of 1984 with a BA in Chemistry and later obtained a BS in Electrical Engineering. I started working for Boeing in October of 1984 and have remained with the company since that time. I have held various positions in my 32+ years with Boeing of increasing responsibility and am currently a Division Chief Engineer. I lead an organization of over 600 engineers and managers. Over the years, I have found my work meaningful and satisfying. I recently became eligible to retire with full benefits including pension and medical for the entire family. However, for now, I have decided to continue with Boeing for a little while longer.

My Family:

My family consists of my immediate family, which includes my younger brother, younger sister, father and step mother (my dad remarried after my mom passed away in 2008). My sister, Jill, was adopted. Our parents had us two boys and simply wanted to have a girl as well. Needless to say, Jill, like myself, is very high on adoption and she is very happy to share her positive adoption experience with your child. Jill has also been very inspirational to me as a prospective adoptive parent because she blended in with the family so seamlessly that we actually have to remind ourselves that she is adopted. She is also a very intelligent, caring loving person who has enriched our family so much. She and her husband are now raising their two lovely daughters.
My “family” also consists of my “new” church family and especially a very important person whom I intend to soon marry. This extended family is my primary support system and they are all already bringing great joy and happiness into my life, along with the family I was born into. Another dimension of my family is my church family, we also get together often and simply laugh and enjoy each other’s company.

Things I enjoy:

In my spare time, I enjoy travel, hiking, bike riding and simply hanging out with friends and family. I so look forward to sharing these experiences with my children.

I am also very active in my church. I teach high school confirmation and am active in our church’s youth program. The youth often feel a special connection with me that is often, sadly, lacking in their own homes. I also serve in our Prison Ministry and Liturgy, mainly as a Lector (Lay Reader) and Eucharistic Minister. I am also considering becoming a Deacon. I normally prefer to keep busy but occasionally enjoy watching a movie. I also very much look forward to becoming a “dad” and embracing the joys and challenges of parenting.

My Home:

I continue to live in the same four-bedroom, two-and-a-half-bath home in suburban Los Angeles (Orange County), CA that I purchased over 15 years ago. It is located on a cul-de-sac street a very family-friendly, safe, gated residential community. It is very spacious and ideal for a family of 3-5. My newly-adopted child will have his/her own bedroom located on the second floor of the home next to my bedroom. The home is nicely decorated, “kid safe” and has several areas for playing, watching TV, etc. It is located in one of LA/Orange County’s finest school districts and is adjacent to a spacious city park that is fully equipped with a playground including swings/slides, several picnic areas and a large field for playing ball. The house also has a large, quiet back yard for playing, gardening and just hanging out with family and friends. The neighborhood is very diverse, full of families/children and would thus welcome a child of any ethnic or racial background as, of course, I do myself.

My Thoughts on Parenting
In a way, my parenting style is much like my proven leadership style and the way I was raised – leading by example. However, as a parent, it involves so much more than that as my children will always also have my love, friendship and encouragement. I fully intend to use God’s/Jesus’ teachings as an example and to do everything possible to help them get to know God. They will be a key source of my own joy and happiness. My friends tell me I am very compassionate and a natural nurturer. I much prefer focusing on guiding/ helping my children to develop the right values/behaviors as they discover and apply their inner strengths and interests versus criticizing everything they do wrong. Instead, I want my kids to know that discipline (including self-discipline) is only to help them become the best, happiest and most fulfilled adults they can possibly be.
In summary, my parenting objectives are twofold (listed in priority order): 1) prepare them for a fulfilling life during which they can be everything that God created them to be. 2) to have fond/happy childhood memories and to use their childhood as a basis for their adult lives and parenting style, just as I will do.
When my kids grow up and are asked “What was your dad like and how was it growing up with him?” I want their answer to be something like “My dad was and was and is my trusted friend, teacher, guide and advocate. He loved us kids more than we could have ever imagined and he was always there for us. He guided us, taught us right from wrong and made it clear that there are consequences to our actions, in his own gentle way. He never spanked us nor was ever mean or unfair to us. He always listened and understood our thoughts and feelings and made sure we understood why we need to do or stop doing things as he tells us. Now that I am an adult, I view my dad as my best friend and role model and I want to be the same kind of dad the he was to me. Thus, growing up with him was easy and fun because we always knew what to expect of him. Yet he challenged us to attain our very best and overcome our perceived natural boundaries. Yet it was seldom stressful because we know he was always there to help us along and that, not matter what, he always has and always will love us.”
I fully realize that this is a very tall order, but I know that, with God’s, help, I will achieve all of these objectives and become a model parent. I know this because it is so deep in my heart (only big unfulfilled part of my life) and all my major life accomplishments to date have already been great

To learn more about a family,
Call Vista Del Mar

(310) 836-1223 ext 281